I don't blog anymore...maybe in the future

Since having our second daughter Giavauna in July of 2010 I have very little time to blog. She is almost a year old! I may someday get back to it, until then I will see you on Facebook.

Bonding time and short lived joy!

With Daddy out of town for a quick 2 1/2 days, I am really looking forward to some bonding time with Alessondra.

We had a great date night with Sushi for dinner and City Bites cookies for dessert, however the real bonding came once we arrived home for the evening.

Jeff and Alessondra have been checking in on and giving water and food to this pigeon (Fuzz) for 3 days or so, it flew into our ceiling fan on the patio of a recently empty lease property. I spoke with the animal shelter today and they agreed to help it and fix it's hurt wing and or leg so today we brought it home to take to the animal shelter tomorrow morning.

Poor Alessondra took this pic , then we put it in it's box with some food, which it did eat a little bit of, checked on it, it was ok, then 5 min later she found it "gone."

Wow, she cried over and over " No My Lovee wake up, no wake up, Lovee I don't want you to be dead!"

One eye did not close when it passed, and she kept saying " No mommy look her eye is still open she is not dead!"

Wow, I am tearing up just remembering all of this, I just had to hold her when she cried and cried : ( We both cried!

She then wanted to keep Fuzz (to remember the bird forever), luckily I was able to talk her into letting me bury it. I found the big shovel and she found her sand shovel.

After the burial and prayer, Alessondra said to me "Mom, you can go inside now, I am going to swing for a little bit and think about Fuzz, I want to be alone."

I am still crying, Am I this emotional because I am pregnant or is it normal??

I just hurt when my little girl hurts... I am in trouble when some stinky boy breaks her "heart!"

Here is a link I found that may help some of you now or in the future:

http://vetmedicine.about.com/od/lossandgrief/a/PetLossAndKids.htm

What about preschool? Aren't you afraid she will be behind?

A friend of mine wrote and posted this on her blog Mommyscope (click the link to go directly to her site for many other great post!)

It is statistics and information like below that led us to slow down our early on "formal" academics with Alessondra. Once I stopped trying to teach her to read at 18 months and started playing with her and doing more games her learning took off!

Have you been thinking about preschool lately? Those with three and four-year olds tend to crank up the anxiety meter about this time of year thinking of their babies heading off to school next fall. Aaaack! Picturing the moment they walk through those doors, forever exiting the baby years, parents feel sudden pressure to get them into the best and brightest preschool academies, some shelling out hundreds (or thousands) of dollars per year in the hopes of propelling them into academic greatness before they reach kindergarten. Others pray they are blessed with a public school or daycare teacher adequately trained and equipped to get their child off on the right foot.

So what about that? Are you one of the majority of parents who believes children will be more successful if they are plunged into the world of academia from the age of….well, birth? Any Your Baby Can Read graduates out there? This is a tricky game our culture has created for children. Does anyone note the peculiar irony of parents scrambling for position to get their little darlings enrolled into ”Harvard” nursery schools, meanwhile the “darlings” themselves would just as soon spend their days digging in the dirt and chasing bugs? (which is precisely something they should be doing) It almost sounds like a humorous scene in a Norman Rockwell painting.

But to be frank, we parents of young children do feel enormous pressure to do this “school thing” right. The varying statistics and information floating around about factors related to early academic success can make a person’s head spin. And because we’re all new at this, we tend to believe whatever is the current trend in early education practices touted by family and friends. We willingly hand our precious children over to professionals, often assuming they know what’s best and can turn our little babies into studious pupils by year’s end. And some of these “professionals” don’t mind letting you know that “we’ll handle it from here.” That literally came out of the mouth of a teacher to a friend of mine once.

In the past few decades, a couple of factors have compelled the government to find ways of improving our early childhood education system, accommodating parents in the work force needing childcare and responding to pressure to compete academically with other countries. And because they, along with teacher’s unions, have financed expensive research in this field, the rest of us tend to accept whatever they recommend. They are the professionals, after all. One method of change has been the tendency to “push down” learning, meaning they are pushing our children at progressively younger ages to pick up formal academics, which basically include reading, writing, and math. They started recruiting three and four-year olds into the schools, “institutionalizing” them, as my friend referred to it the other day, plopping them into tiny little desks for hours a day. The assumption was that if children entered the system earlier, it would allow more time to cram knowledge into their brains, roll them down the conveyor belt called “school”, and turn out a better and more successful product for society in the end.

Well, that hasn’t worked out so well. Amid this grand experiment, educators have begun realizing that formal academics for these youngsters isn’t the answer. Test scores have not improved and cases of learning disabilities have actually increased, along with ADD/ADHD and other behavioral problems. We have essentially backtracked as a result of pushing these young children to do things their brains are developmentally unprepared to handle. And their little bodies, made for running and jumping at this age, are being stifled by extended hours sitting at desks. Did you know that cognitive learning is directly built upon proper development of gross and fine motor skills? It’s no wonder these children, little boys especially, are being incorrectly labeled as ADD/ADHD and learning disabled. They should be outside! They should be spending more time doing arts and crafts, not worksheets. And early reading CAN be accomplished. But if the child is pushed before he/she is ready, it can result in reading comprehension problems not apparent until as late as middle school. More recent research has shown that preschoolers ARE capable of more than we think. But in our narrow-mindedness, we have connected early formal education with future academic success…there’s so much more to it than that.

A recent study by the Albert Shanker Institute titled “Preschool Curriculum: What’s In It for Children and Teachers” shows that through various experiences of free play, structured play, read-alouds, discussions, songs, games, projects, and other active learning opportunities, preschoolers develop the cognitive and social skills necessary for successful elementary learning. For those who stay at home and spend any amount of time with your children, does this all sound familiar? Pre-reading and pre-math skills are learned through activities that have no resemblance to formal education at all. Art, music, movement activities, and imaginary play all serve vital roles in preparing their minds for reading and math skills. It’s interesting that after all the time and money spent on research, we’ve come to the conclusion that young children learn best just by being children. But it’s also encouraging to know that educational scholars are taking note, and it will be interesting to see how soon it filters down into the public school systems.

Dr. Jane Healy, author of Your Child’s Growing Mind, Endangered Minds, and Failure to Connect, would probably agree with some (not all) of what this study concluded. Brain development progresses from the lower to upper regions, from brain stem to outer cortex, through a process called myelination. Infant development centers around lower functions such as basic neurological, sensory, and gross motor skills, gradually spreading outward. The neuron connections build upon themselves, forming pathways which ultimately lead to the outer cortex where cognitive skills are mastered, including reading and math, among other things. Pushing children to develop formal skills before their brains are ready causes forced neural pathways in lower parts of the brain to undertake complex tasks they are not equipped to handle. That’s why you have children show up with learning disabilities later in school, because they’ve been using the wrong parts of their brain to handle complex cognitive tasks and it eventually catches up. Have you ever heard that until a child can ride a bike without training wheels, their brains are not ready for reading? The gross motor skills required for balancing a bicycle are foundational in making the connections required to develop a successful reader. You won’t hear the makers of Your Baby Can Read talking about the science of child brain development. But then again, they stand to gain a lot of money from unsuspecting parents, taking advantage of their natural desire to see their children succeed. Just because they CAN read at that age (and it’s not even actual reading, but rather memorization of word pictures) doesn’t mean they SHOULD. More information can be found in Dr. Healy’s book, Your Child’s Growing Mind.

An added note regarding early formal education is the eye factor. Until age five or six, the eye muscles are still developing rapidly. Many optometrists agree that straining children’s eye muscles too early by forcing reading of small print is likely a contributor in the rise of nearsightedness among our youth. Just another thing to think about.

My point in discussing this is to encourage you as parents to take an active role in your child’s education, realizing that only in the last few decades has there ever been such a push to force young children into early academics. If you choose to put your child in preschool or are in a position where you have no choice, ask questions, get an idea of what type of learning environment the school has created. If it includes lots of hands-on activities, free-play, outside time, read-alouds, and interaction with nurturing staff, you are probably on the right track. If your child sits at a desk all day and gets sent home with a stack of worksheets every night, voice your concern or get them out of there if at all possible. Some may not have recognized it, but we are ALL “homeschoolers” to some degree. Just how much of that role you are willing to relinquish when they reach school age is up to you. But keep in mind that you are ultimately your child’s best advocate, and a quality education from the start will serve your child well throughout the rest of their life.

My next post on this subject will discuss Preschool At Home, an argument in favor of what I believe to be the highest quality preschool education available, teaching them yourself in a nurturing home environment. I will outline what that looks like and how you can get started. So check back or subscribe to my e-mail list. Happy schooling!

Go to Mommyscope blog

Happy 54th Birthday Dad, We miss you!

My husband, Jeff produced this video for us. It is one of the BEST gifts he has ever given me!

I wish you all could of known him he was the BEST father!

Sept 9th 2007 he went on to Heaven.

I am thankful that he is GREAT, he is not in pain, he is happy, he can run and he can use his hands completely.

Even knowing all of this, I still miss him and wish he could be here.

I hope you enjoy the video:

Bible Study starts up this Wed Jan 27th 9:30 am

Within The Word:

We will be studying the letters of Paul, starting in the book of Galations. We meet Wednesday at 9:30am-11:30am

Our group is a mix of ages and different stages of life. Mostly (28-60 years of age) some college students, Younger Moms , older moms, some have teenage children, blended families, and a few have grown children and grand children.

These older women have become such awesome role models and mentors for me and I learn tons from the other moms. So it is a great mix! We are all from different walks of life. We will laugh, cry and fellowship together.

Childcare: Currently we meet at a home in Gallairdia and the children are upstairs in the playroom.

We do pay for childcare, those of us that use it, it usually comes to $3 or $4 per child apiece.

We have 3 homeschooled girls that watch them.

The girls are great and the oldest is 15 years old and is CPR certified!

However if you can not afford to pay childcare, we can take care of that. We have a fund that other members donate to, so we can take care of any childcare if it can not be afforded! Please let me personally know if this is something you need assistance with.

Kathy Patton teaches and writes the Bible study.

After she teaches we then break up into 2 or 3 small groups to discuss the passages and that weeks homework.

The homework is not a lengthy assignment. It is usually about 15-20 questions about that weeks chapter that should take you anywhere from 30 min to 2 hours, depending how much you dive into the passages.

Kathy has written and taught many bible studies and has taught for many many years, she is AWESOME!! Found out more about her by clicking HERE

There is no cost for the study, we will upload the HW to our website www.withintheword.com weekly and you can download and print it at you convenience. .

Please check out our website too see some of the videos of the teaching and samples of the homework.

We do not mind if you come and try us out....kinda like speed dating : )

We begin meeting again on Jan 27th, 9:30 am

Just come and check us out at any time and if this is not the group for you I will try to help find the "one" for you, no problem!

Just let me know or check to make sure we are meeting, we do not normally take breaks during a semester but sometimes we do have to switch locations.

Oh Yea there are approx 15-20 that attend regularly and yes we have room for you!

PS Let me know if you plan to come, so we can be prepared with adequate childcare.
Let me know any other questions

Gaillardia Edition. ½ mile north of Memorial Road on MacArthur Boulevard

address is 5301 Pulchella Dr Oklahoma City, 73142, let the "guard" know you are going to the Tibbs home.

Turn in front gate of Gaillardia, turn right, take next right.. It's 3rd house on left, you can park along street by waterfall

Link to a map click HERE

email me at deziray@clickworld.net if you have any questions

Fit Kids Make Smart Adults

As most of you know I am into health, fitness and education so I thought I would share this with you:

I loved the latest blog post from
Joyce Cherrier’s Blog
Empowering People to be Healthy and Fit And Having Fun While Doing It!

I follow her on Twitter and her blog, she knows her stuff!

Fit Kids Make Smart Adults
There are dozens of articles about all the physical and mental reaosns to get fit. Almost on a daily basis a new study comes out, giving another compelling reason to be healthy. As an adult we make the decision every day to either move towards being healthy or away from health. That’s our choice. But what about our kids? Is it really fair to short change them because we lack motivation to get healthy? I really believe it’s our responsibility to give them opportunity to be their very best. I won’t even begin to go into a rant about obese children. They eat what we give them. As adults we set the table. Now a study shows evidence that not only does exercise affect a child physically but also mentally.

In this article in ScienceDaily a study showed a connection between young adults exercising and their I.Q. Here’s what the study found: Young adults who are fit have a higher IQ and are more likely to go on to university, reveals a major new study carried out at the Sahlgrenska Academy and Sahlgrenska University Hospital.

The study shows a clear link between good physical fitness and better results for the IQ test. The strongest links are for logical thinking and verbal comprehension. But it is only fitness that plays a role in the results for the IQ test, and not strength. “Being fit means that you also have good heart and lung capacity and that your brain gets plenty of oxygen,” says Michael Nilsson, professor at the Sahlgrenska Academy and chief physician at the Sahlgrenska University Hospital. “This may be one of the reasons why we can see a clear link with fitness, but not with muscular strength. We are also seeing that there are growth factors that are important.”

“We have also shown that those youngsters who improve their physical fitness between the ages of 15 and 18 increase their cognitive performance,” says Maria Åberg, researcher at the Sahlgrenska Academy and physician at Åby health centre. “This being the case, physical education is a subject that has an important place in schools, and is an absolute must if we want to do well in maths and other theoretical subjects.”

Based on this study the link seems to be about oxygen and the brain. Great incentive to walk the dog and take the kids when you do. Or maybe they can mow the lawn and shovel the driveway. I think I dreamed about that once. A bike ride on an afternoon is a great way to get some cardio time in. I also suggest a DVD by the creator of Insanity called Shaun T’s Fit Kids Club. Great for a winter day when outside is not an option.

The whole family can get involved and it can be used as quality time. It’s an investment in your child’s future. It also sets good habits in motion. And fitness is contagious. Before you know it, the whole family will be involved. I remember as a kid my mom telling me to get off my duff and go outside and get some fresh air. Of course she never said it would make me smarter. I’m sure she would have liked that in her arsenal. Now we parents, needing a break as we do sometimes, can say, “Go outside and play, you’ll get in a good college!” I’m really hoping one of these studies come out about cleaning bedrooms, doing their own laundry and washing dishes.

4 year old funnies

Alessondra: Dad, can we still watch the CMA show when it's on? The one with that Carrie Underwear girl on it? #alolod

Alessondra, crying over @DezirayClick's trip away: Daddy, we'll do art, watch movies, & play war with cards. But there! Will! Be! No! Mommy!. #alolod

Jeff Click to a crying Alessondra as @DezirayClick leaves for a trip: Will a Twizzler cheer u up? A: Wul, no, I because I want Mommy more. #alolod

Are you smarter than a 4 year old..I am FOR SURE NOT!!

We were blessed with tickets to The Legend of Sleepy Hollow Ballet tonight, Thanks Aunt Lisa! What a great way to spend Halloween night!

We have looked forward to the day when we could take Alessondra to one of our all time favorite restaurants, Cheevers!

Daddy decided that tonight would be a great night, it is not far from the Civic Center and she is old enough to behave properly in a nice restaurant. Below is a conversation between Jeff and her on our way to the restaurant:

Jeff: Alessondra we are taking you to Mommy & Daddy's favorite restaurant, Cheevers. There'll be art on the walls that I bet you will like.
Alessondra: Monet?
Jeff:No.
Alessondra:Daddy will there be any pointillism?
Jeff:Monet didn't do pointillism.
Alessondra:I KNOW THAT DADDY, Georges Seirat did! #alolod



Alessondra enjoying her first look at her "Seafood Tamales"